7/27/2004

Kicking Ass and Taking Names:
Teresa Heinz Kerry - So let's get this straight: the Vice President of the United States can tell an elected Senator to "Go fuck yourself" and there's a mild ripple, as if this is all just old boy's club bullshit. But if the wife of the nominee tells a vicious attack dog lackey of the right wing to "Shove it" after he tries to corner her into saying something she did not say, it's a crisis in the management of the campaign. Here's an entry from Colin McNickle's badly written blog: "Saturday's Boston weather dawned rainy and unseasonally cool -- fall-like. Oh, Democrats are in town. Sunday, it was still cool with sun but with sometimes-threatening skies. Kind of like those Democrat programs that offer sun but, and as the Law of Unintended Consequences dictates, usually rain on just about everybody's parade." You know what? This tool can shove it up his ass. And anyone who treats him as a victim is a sexist asshole who can't stand honesty in politics, especially when it comes from a woman.

Bill Clinton - Sometimes you just wanna tell Bill Clinton, "Fuck it. I'd've blown you, too." 'Cause after his speech last night eviscerated the Republicans and their agenda. Putting out there simply: you judge a man by the choices he has made in his life. Here's the choices John Kerry made. Here's the choices George Bush made. And Clinton, using hard numbers and facts, took apart the record of the Republican Congress and administration. Doing so, Clinton did something incredibly empowering to anyone listening: you have the power to choose - use it. He used historical references to say that Americans have chosen to right wrongs in the past, so now is the time to do it gain. Goddamn, what a motherfucker of a speech. Sure, his repeated message of Kerry saying "Send me" echoed with the resonance that a vote for Kerry is a vote for Clinton, but isn't that the point? And when he said of Republicans, "They need a divided America; we don't," it was a summation of everything wrong in a succinct, Fahrenheit 9/11-like line. Jesus, the Rude Pundit is so hot for that Clinton cock right now that he needs to go smoke a cigar to sublimate, sweetly, sweetly sublimate. It's the flush of the moment, sure, but, fuck, why not enjoy it like a fine Cuban on a sultry night?

Three speeches in three lines:
Al Sharpton's speech to the Black Caucus about George Bush proposing Republicans as a viable alternative for black voters: Niggah, please.

The speech by the ghost of Al Gorelast night: Remember meeeee, booo, remember meeee.

Jimmy Carter's "Who Spiked the Geritol?" speech: Don't piss off the peaceful man, motherfucking George Bush, or he will fuck your shit up, you goddamn lying sack of shit deserter.

Later today: and over on the right . . .