7/31/2006

Bend Over, Baby, So I Can Reach Your Wallet
You really have to admire the frank fuck-you attitude of our elected representatives, who are taking a month's much-deserved vacation after the House said, yeah, you hourly-wage earning bastards can have an extra couple bucks an hour three years from now, but only if the Senate gives the people who really count a ten million dollar tax exemption. Oh, and the next fifteen million gets taxed at 15%. Which is only fair, because you wage slaves working for a generous $7.25 an hour will only be paying 15% on your annual (vacation-free!) income of $15,000! Which is well above the poverty line of $9,800. Really, who needs more than that?

Oh right, rich kids. Well, it's only fair, after all. Y'all on the minimum wage ought not be breeding anyway, and if you're gonna have kids, you really should accomodate their palates to dumpster food early. Whereas these parasites couldn't survive under such adverse conditions.

Plus, as long as you commoners are preoccupied with how to make fifteen thou a year buy enough gas to keep getting you to work on time--better not be late again, buddy, if you want to keep that minimum-wage job--you'll be way too busy to pay any attention to oh, say how the State Department's been keeping its books. Now that Ken Lay's "retired" to the Dick Cheney Underground Bunker (avoiding prison and protecting his estate, if you recall), he's got more time for teaching those seminars on pocket-lining, insider contracts, and accounting shell games, and we want to make sure that y'all keep our wage costs down and our interest payments up buying those plasma televisions keeping a roof over your heads.

So stop wasting your employer's time and money reading about "ballooning cost overruns" and "withheld information on schedule delays" and "federal audits," peasants, and get back to work. The NSA is reporting your blog-reading time to your boss, and your paychecks will be docked accordingly.