11/05/2006

In Brief: Saddam To Hang, America To Yawn:
As November Surprises go, the conviction and sentencing of Saddam Hussein on crimes against humanity is about as surprising as, say, discovering that fucking a corpse ain't all that it's cracked up to be. You might get your rocks off, but, in the end, you're just poking dead ass. (Isn't there some Iraqi proverb about poking a dead ass?)

Sure, the timing is beyond suspicious, now, less than three days before the beginning of the post-election lawsuits. You know, c'mon, how do we get from spider hole to noose at this most politically expedient moment without some Rovean goosing? But is there a single person in this country whose reaction doesn't fall into the range between a bemused "Yeah, didn't see that coming" to a confused "He's still alive?" It's too late for this to have any impact, a waste of a perfectly good promise of execution.

Republicans and the right in general have had more surprises come from within over the last few weeks (Foley, Haggard, nuke secrets posted to the internet, and on and on) that they've made the populace numb to anything that might even be spun as good news for them.

They've fucked the goat. And once you know someone's fucked a goat, you can never look at that person the same way.

Tomorrow: Why Vote For Democrats.

Note: Goat-fucking reference comes from this old joke: A man is sitting at a bar, drinking, and he says to no one in particular, "A man can spend his life building bridges. Do they call him John the Bridge Builder? No. A man can spend his life raising crops. Do they call him John the Farmer? No. But you fuck one goat..."